The idea of love is thrilling, excitement from the discovery of the new things that your eyes are suddenly being opened to. One moment you’re just comfortably living your own life and then in the blink of an eye you are being blasted by heart-throbbing emotions and the way you see the world became not just about you. Mula sa buhay na iniintindi mo lang ang gagawin mo sa araw-araw ay biglang may isa nang tao na kasama na sa bawat desisyon na gagawin mo.
Pero minsan dahil sa sobrang pagmamahal na binibigay mo ay nagkukulang na ang nailalaan mo para sa sarili mo. Dahil sa isang iglap naging mundo mo na ang taong iyon. When you love someone you want to do everything that can make them happy. But relationships shouldn’t just revolve around on the things that benefit one person. You should receive while you are giving. Hindi kailangan pantay, hindi kailangan balanse, hindi kailangan magbilangan pero dapat parehong nagbibigay.
Minsan kasi bigay ka nang bigay dahil nakadepende ang kasiyahan mo sa kung ano ang magpapasaya sa kaniya. Umiikot ang buhay mo sa mga bagay na importante para sa kaniya. But if you take all that away, ano’ng matitira sa iyo? If you depend your happiness on another person and focus your entirety to what makes them happy, you’ll eventually lose your own identity until what makes you “you” becomes just a blurred idea.
You don’t need to compromise self-love so you can love somebody else. How can you give love to a person when you have nothing left to give?
Importante na hindi ka kulang. Importante na puno ang pagmamahal mo para sa sarili mo para magawa mong maiparamdam iyon sa ibang tao. You can only make someone feel the presence of love if you know what it means.
Bago mo nakilala ang taong mahal mo ay may “ikaw” na minahal niya. Kung mawawala iyon ay makakalimutan na rin niya kung ano ang maaari niyang ibigay sa iyo. Because if everything you want becomes what that person needs then sooner or later he will just keep on receiving because that is what you are tolerating. By losing yourself, you are turning the relationship to be just about one person and not the two of you.
Pero minsan talaga makakatagpo ka ng tao na hindi magawang makita ang nakikita mo sa kanya. Iyong klase ng tao na hindi kayang ibigay ang kaya mo para sa kanya. Know when to let go and when to keep holding on. Because sometimes the more you keep tightening your grasp on that person the more he’ll be bruised and the more your hands will bleed. Learn to understand what is best for you because sometimes knowing that can work for the both of your interest. When you know your limits, you can set boundaries on what you can handle and what you should expect so you won’t reach the point where the relationship becomes destructive.
All types of relationships are not about loving yourself first. It’s about not loving yourself less so you can love a person more. Hindi ibig sabihin kapag may problema ay kailangan mo nang sumuko. Ang ibig sabihin lang ay hindi mo kailangang ikompromiso ang pagmamahal na meron ka para sa sarili mo para lang magawa mong maibigay ang pagmamahal na iyon sa iba.
Not every relationship is worth fighting for. Sometimes it’s enough that you are worth fighting for.
This article was originally written by MsButterfly for “BHO CAMP 2: The Rockstar’s Personal Assistant.”
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